Slovenia - can you put your hand on your heart and say you know exactly where it is? Could you find it on a map? It has been tricky, these past few centuries, what with the territory having variously formed part of the Holy Roman and Habsburg empires and most recently the former Yugoslavia.
South of Hungary ... somewhere near Austria? OK, I'll put you out of your misery: cosmopolitan Slovenia is surrounded by Italy, Austria, Hungary and Croatia, with a mere 29-mile Adriatic coastline. This results in an intriguing mix of Austrian efficiency and business sense alongside an Italian attitude towards food, style and time. Even the Slovene language has its fair share of foreign imports such as "ciao" for hi, pršut for cured ham and "zeit" for time.
Roughly the size of Wales and independent since 1991, Slovenia is a land of emerald green hills, handsome inhabitants and bonecrackingly firm handshakes, where the locals' capacity for hospitality and fondness for slow food is an invitation to take the pace right down.
For millennia, this land has stood at the crossroads of Europe: the Roman road from Venice to the Black Sea passed through here, as did Napoleon's army on its way to Russia. Meanwhile, the Venetians once controlled the south-west of the country, leaving their delicate architectural mark on the present day.
Often, these historical riches lie only a fraction below the surface. When I asked an unassuming waiter at a family-run Ljubljana gostilna (inn) whether they had been in business for long, he replied: "Yes, for quite a while", before casually revealing that Napoleon himself had stayed upstairs, and they had kept the bed.
Under the Austrian Habsburgs, Slovenia was on the frontline to Croatia and the Ottoman lands beyond, hence the development of many fortifications and castles. These days, many of the medieval fortresses have been converted into luxurious, though still affordable, hotels. I began my Slovenian adventure in one such castle, the Hotel Mokrice, located so close to Croatia that I could see the flashing lights of the border post - and frontier of the EU - from my bathroom window. (It's a matter of time before Relais & Chateaux discover it and push prices up, so visit now.)
I began with a lovely meal in the Mokrice's restaurant, housed in one of the corner turrets of the fairy-tale building, whose foot-smoothed stairs still smelt of ancient polish. Although occupying German soldiers made off with most of the castle's furnishings during the second world war, a heavy wooden table and set of baronial-sized chairs remain to evoke the ancient regime. The food was excellent but copious and heavy - if in doubt when ordering in Slovenia, I'd always go for soup.
In the morning it was time to roll out across the castle bridge, past its Roman milestone, and book in to have the previous night's meal worked off by my first spa treatment. Central Europe has long been known for its spas and Slovenians are particularly keen on their own brand of "wellness centres" (not to be confused with pampering). Many families will take their annual holidays at one of the 15 thermal spa complexes around the country, while post-operative hospital patients have traditionally been sent to a spa to recuperate at the state's expense. This can often lend the establishments a slight "geriatric ward" feel, though hoteliers are now waking up to the potential of the massage-hungry Italian and British markets and are in the midst of a major rebranding exercise.
Hardly a new hotel is opening without a beautiful, state-of-the-art spa extension, often part-funded by the EU. Whether you choose a "Cleopatra bath" combining in-water music therapy with an intricate fibre-optic light show on the ceiling, or a "hair massage" in an alarmingly high-tech chair, the cost will be a fraction of those in the UK. Just be aware that nudity in saunas is taken extremely seriously. If you're not prepared to strip, don't go in, as spa attendants will order you to remove "unhygienic" nylon accessories with no, ahem, buts.
I have to admit I wasn't feeling too pampered as my "Arctic salt scrub" was administered at Terme Čate's minimalist new centre, but afterwards my polished skin felt as soft as a baby's, and I was struck by the range of treatments on offer, from Roman-Irish baths to Japanese and Thai massages. The year-round leisure complex - a little like a Slovenian version of Center Parcs - has 12,000 sq m of "thermal riviera" and started life in the 20s. It has a range of three-and four-star hotels for families, longer term spa patients and increasingly, tourists on pamper breaks. I'd head for the Hotel Čate for the newest facilities or the classy Castle Mokrice (owned by the same company) to escape the crowds.
Breice, the picturesque nearby town, is well worth a detour for its Posavski castle museum. The collection takes you on a historical journey from the earliest Roman and Celtic settlers through to the local legacy of Nazi and partisan fighting in the second world war. Don't miss the grandeur of the knights' hall with its baroque frescoes and optical illusions. The hall and courtyard will also host some of this summer's Breice festival of early music in late June.
It was definitely time for a retox, so I dropped in on distinguished local producer Janez Sekoranja, south of Bizeljsko. With conversation straining in English, I asked if French might be easier. It turned out that the moustachioed Mr Sekoranja was the descendant of a Napoleonic soldier who married a Slovenian on his way back from Russia, so we were off to a flying debut. The local grape variety "sipon" is so named, he told me, because the Napoleonic forces who tried it exclaimed "c'est bon!" After leading me down into his chilly, hand-dug "repnice" (cellars traditionally used to store turnips), he showed me his order book. Supplying no less than the UN, Bill Clinton, Alain Ducasse's Essex House in New York and several European royal families, Sekoranja is certainly well placed to educate visitors about the 30 local grape varieties.
Though little known in Britain, mainly due to the small levels of boutique production and relatively high prices, Slovenian wines are strictly regulated, offer great variety and are gaining popularity, particularly in the US. Generally, the wines are more Italian in style near the Mediterranean coast in the south-west, (it's just a short hop to the Veneto, after all) while the north-east region produces heartier Hungarian-style reds and the south-east is known for crisp Rieslings and pudding wines. Slovenia's wine drinkers are fiercely local in their allegiance - you'll be hard pressed to find a south-western Refosk served in a gostilna in the east of the country - so it pays to do some research before setting off.
Alternatively, you can spend a pleasant hour or two working your taste buds around the country at a wine showroom in Ljubljana. Provin. A 10-minute taxi ride north of the city, they stock an impressive range of 800 wines from all the regions and you can taste a selection of for free in their "wine gallery". This way you can get a sommelier's advice on which vineyards to visit once you have established your favourite varieties, or it's just as cheap to buy direct from the warehouse. Visitors can drop into the shop and wine gallery but you need to reserve and pay eight to 10 euros if you want a more bespoke tasting.
For the genuine article, however, it would be hard to beat a visit to the rolling vineyards around Jeruzalem, so named (according to the legend, anyway) by Crusaders as they passed through and sampled the wine. My jovial hosts at the Puklavec family vineyard (and B&B) welcomed me at 6pm and didn't kick me out until midnight, opening bottle after bottle and producing plate after plate of delicious pršut. Truly a bon viveur, a visit here is a guaranteed highlight of the wine route, though Mr Puklavec helps to bring a bilingual interpreter.
After this alcoholic onslaught it was time for one last deep cleanse so I checked into the shiny new Vitarium Klinik at 5marjeske Toplice. Another dazzling new extension to an existing spa complex, Vitarium is in a league of its own, with equipment most British hospitals would envy. Medical supervision is available for the hardcore detox and weight loss programmes, though day trippers won't be disappointed with the massage menu. I opted for a Cleopatra bath, which was as OTT as it comes, with disco lights, "therapeutic" disco music and hundreds of powerful jets working the tension from my legs and back. Then I braved a "hair massage" on a chair that worked its way robotically up and down my spine while a steel-fingered male therapist worked the tension from my scalp. The look and feel is St Tropez, without the price tag to match. But it will be even better once a separate entrance is built so that you don't have to march down the old hospital ward-style corridor to reach the new facilities.
It is easy to see why pre-independence Slovenia drew hundreds of thousands of tourists annually, particularly to its jaw-dropping Postojna caves with their 21 km of galleries. Overnight, when trouble broke out across the border, the visitors dried up and Slovenia was no longer on the road to anything like a beach holiday in Croatia. But the country is certainly now back open for business and its varied landscapes and appeal are drawing in the visitors keen to find a safe, welcoming destination in the "new Europe".
WAY TO GO
EasyJet flies to Ljubljana daily from London Stansted, while Ryanair flies to nearby Graz (Austria), Trieste (Italy), and from September to Maribor in north-eastern Slovenia. You can also take the train from Venice if you have more time to savour the views.
You can get advice on itineraries and book trips through Atlas Express a Slovenian travel agency, which is working with new UK operator Destination Slovenia. Email: info@destinationslovenia.com for more information.
Where to stay
Hotel Grad Mokrice
Double rooms cost from 77.62 euros per person half board at the weekend (minimum two nights' stay), golf packages available for 70 euros per day including half board and a green fee
Tel +386 7 457 42 40, mokrice@terme-catez.si
Vitarium Hotel and Spa
Šmarjeske Toplice
A double room in the Vitarium Hotel costs from 62 euros per night, value spa packages available
Tel +386 7 38 43 400, smarjeske@terme-krka.si
Where to taste wine
Provin wine showroom, Ljubljana
Tel +386 (0)1 568 1619, provin@eunet.si
Janez Sekoranja, Bizeljsko
Tel +386 (0)74951059, sekoranja_janez@yahoo.com
Puklavec winery (Slovenian language), Tel +386 (0)2 719 11 97, puklavecb@volja.net
Useful links
Slovenian Tourist Board: general information and enquiries
slovino.com: information on Slovenian wines
spa-slovenia.com: spas around Slovenia
Carbon offset
Guardian Unlimited paid Climate Care £2.04 to offset the 0.27 tonnes of carbon dioxide generated by this writer's flights from London Stansted to Trieste and from Ljubljana to London Stansted.
