Storme is going to the ball. She will dress up in her gown, be driven to the Battersea Arts Centre by her chauffeur (aka Mum), where she will tuck me up in bed before wafting off to dance and play the night away with performers from around the world. A secret passageway will connect the parents' pretend bedroom with the ballroom, along which a mum may crawl if they feel their partying child needs a reassuring cuddle. I won't be making that short journey. I would only be greeted by the words: "Mum - PUSH OFF."

The Ball, for six to 10 year olds, is part of this year's LIFT (London International Festival of Theatre, liftfest.org), a feast of events, plays and puppet shows that continues until June 21. For the first time, LIFT is being billed as "a family friendly season", where children won't only be seen but also heard.

As part of the festival, there's an international debate on young people as "artsmakers" (I hear the heavy hand of art-speak here), led by a 30-strong group who very rarely get asked their thoughts on the subject - kids themselves.

We hope children will also contribute to our forthcoming Kids in Museums campaign, prompted by two-year-old River being thrown out of the Royal Academy's Aztec exhibition for being rowdy, shouting 'Monster!' at a statue of Eagle Man. If any of your kids have something to say on how welcome (or unwelcome) they feel in museums and galleries, let us know. Of course, parents can chip in as well, as long as they behave themselves...

Thankfully, there are still places where children are allowed - encouraged, even - to shout. Zippo's circus (zippos.co.uk) is one, currently touring south London and Surrey. And Billy Smart's is pitching its tent in Hull over half-term (billy-smarts-circus.co.uk). Altogether now: "HE'S BEHIND YOOOOOU!"

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