Within just five minutes of arriving on Shetland I'm made aware that I've muttered a terrible faux pas.
"It's Shetland. Not Shetlands," says my taxi driver, quietly and firmly. I'm terrified. I've already made the dreadful mistake of thinking I was on Orkney. I'm not. My driver has emitted a grumble and I've decided it's probably best if I don't say another word.
I'm here to meet Hazel Tindall, the fastest knitter in the world (more of this later) and to explore the new Shetland Craft Trail. The island has exchanged crofting for crafting and is awash with knitting needles, crochet hooks and ream upon ream of yarn. Rather brilliantly, the Shetland Arts & Crafts Association has produced a map of the islands that reflects its creative landscape and you can journey from Unst in the north to Scousburgh in the south taking in every craftmaker, designer and artist the islands have to offer.
I've been told to meet Hazel outside a health food shop in Lerwick. A bitter wind is blowing and it's raining sideways. It's all very Graham Greene and I can't help hoping we're going to find ourselves embroiled in a thriller deeper than the seas. Hazel is precisely what I was expecting: diminutive frame, sparkling blue eyes, face as soft as marshmallow and the gentlest voice I think I've ever heard.
"I left the island in 1969," she says, as she walks me to a small box room filled with files and tubs of wool, "and when I left I thought I would never be able to return. But I did. In 1983."
Before the oil came in 1971, there were few opportunities for women on Shetland. Other than crofting and fishing, there was no other industry and knitting was a woman's only way of contributing to the family purse.
"I have a diary of my mother's," Hazel tells me. "It was tiny. About three inches high. She wrote in it every day. And one entry just reads: 'I hope I can afford a bigger diary next year.' It was a tough life back then. Knitting was a means of putting food on the table. People forget this."
Hazel can't remember the first time she had knitting needles in her hands but does know she learned to knit before she learned to read. "There were three generations of women in the house," she explains, "and all of them were knitting. Children want to copy what they see. Back then knitting was taught in schools. We'd make mittens, hats, hot water bottle covers. They've stopped that now. I think it's a shame."
Hazel is so softly spoken I find myself wondering how on earth she musters a competitive spirit but I have a sneaking suspicion that under the gentle exterior lies needles of steel.
"I am the fastest knitter in the world," Hazel leans forward to tell me, "but I'm not in Guinness World Records. That's someone else."
She raises an eyebrow and I sense a whiff of shenanigans. "A Dutch woman, Miriam Tegels, heard about me and she contacted Guinness, who weren't present at my record-making attempt, and arranged to knit under their conditions. She only did a minute. I did three. And she had different size needles and all her stitches were on one needle."
I know nothing about the world of speed knitting but this sounds to me like a scandal. "What did you do?" I ask.
Hazel sits back and folds her arms. "Oh, I've knitted against her," she tells me, her eyes twinkling. "In Minneapolis. She's very good at self-publicity. All the cameras were on her. And she was sporting. I'll give her that. She let me borrow her talc for my hands before we started. She was sitting to my right. But by the time I'd finished my first row I knew I was ahead." She nods silently.
"How many stitches did you do?"
Hazel shrugs. "Normally I don't remember. There's no reason for remembering things if you don't have to. But I did 262."
"How many did Miriam do?"
"250."
"Why don't you do it again? For Guinness?"
"It's a lot of faff."
There's a glorious, quiet confidence to Hazel that I'm enjoying tremendously. Given that she clearly wanted to win, I find myself wondering if, at the moment of triumph, she might have let out a whoop? Hazel shakes her head. "I waved my hands in the air to keep people happy," she says. "but I'm not one for showing off. There's plenty of knitters on Shetland faster than me."
What comes through is Hazel's pride in Shetland and that, really, is the essence of the trail. The landscape is glorious, the weather skittish and wild and what better way of seeing the islands than going from studio to shop to sitting room visiting knitters such as Hazel? It's a brilliant and inventive way to see the islands. And if you're very lucky, Hazel may show you how fast she is but for heaven's sake, don't say Shetlands.
• Download the Shetland Craft Trail map at shetlandartsandcrafts.co.uk. Hazel gives knitting demonstrations at the Shetland Textile Working Museum (scottish-places.info) in Lerwick. The Windward B&B (01595 880769, accommodation-shetland.co.uk, doubles from £50 B&B) in Port Arthur provided Emma's accommodation
Follow Emma Kennedy on Twitter @EmmaK67