The railway hotel is enjoying a renaissance. The Midland Grand, the famous Victorian gothic fantasy at St Pancras, re-emerges as a Marriott (the St Pancras Renaissance Hotel) this May, and Glasgow's 19th-century Grand Central Hotel has had a £20m restoration.
Both are on my "to-do" list, but online magazine Hotel Designs (@HotelDesigns on Twitter) picks out Hull's Royal Hotel, which had its own £1.5m facelift last spring.
Bet Queen Victoria didn't arrive by rail replacement bus in 1854 (at what was, pre-royal visit, the Station Hotel). In 2010, a slow haul by road means I've missed afternoon tea, served in the lobby until 5pm. Blast. Muttering unprintables, I finally march across the decidedly chill station concourse to push open swing doors into the hotel.
Pinch me someone. Is this Humberside or Milan? Arches, potted palms, velvet sofas and a bar of genteel proportions come into view, but most arresting of all is the ceiling, populated by 15 dramatic, tubular lampshades in a hue of burnished bronze.
What is lovely is this grand lobby is very much in use. All the seating is occupied. There is constant chatter and a stream of comings and goings from the low-key station entrance I used, and the magnificent York stone main entrance at the far end. "Ooh – this is new isn't it?" I overhear one woman say to her friend as they pull off hats and gloves. It's clearly a far cry from the dismal atmosphere local poet Philip Larkin wrote of in this very place, when "all the salesmen have gone back to Leeds/Leaving full ashtrays in the Conference Room" (Friday Night at the Royal Station Hotel, written in 1966).
Turns out I'm sharing the lobby this evening with the Model Railway Society, some conference delegates, and members of the 188-year-old Hull Literary and Philosophical Society.
Pity the designers didn't take all this regular patronage into consideration. It's clearly a much-loved meeting spot, yet people are perching on silly padded stools when there's ample space for more sofas and armchairs. Atmosphere's great, though. Here was me thinking the three-star hotel an anachronism, elbowed out of usefulness by our polarised demands for either top-whack opulence or rock-bottom budget.
Up to my executive double. Expectedly bland in some ways – furniture, colour scheme – but pleasant enough, with a view of the war memorial on Paragon Square (and the taxi rank). Historic touches include the hairdryer (the On button has to be kept pressed in, for God's sake). Modern additions are free Wi-Fi and a good mattress. Room service is from the lounge menu, but I'm not interested in scoffing in solitude for a surcharge of £3.50; I want the vibe downstairs.
I eat dinner in the fashionably low-lit restaurant looking out over platform four. Light courgette fritters come with a nice sticky chilli dip and weirdly cold grilled cherry tomatoes in balsamic. Braised lamb shoulder with crushed new potatoes is tasty but the accompanying veg less so.
The real Achilles heel though, is breakfast. I manage a healthy start by sprinkling plain yoghurt with some raisins and walnuts, but a hot buffet is never a good thing – though the eggs are poached to order (with vinegar, I suspect).
I leave by train (hurrah) convinced of four things. Hull is full of inspirational places to visit. The railway hotel is back. There is a future for the three-star. Hot buffet breakfasts do not have a role in any of this.
• East Coast trains link Hull directly with London, the East Midlands, north-east England and Scotland. Standard advance returns, booked online at eastcoast.co.uk, from London Kings Cross to Hull cost from £18.70. Further information: enjoyengland.com
